Day 24 | What Now?

 

“It is a happiness to wonder; it is a happiness to dream.”

-Edgar Allen Poe

“People will continue to do what is comfortable to them, but I think reaching out and trying to provide education can help. I am hoping that is what I can offer leaving this experiment, along with more understanding for the millions that live like this every day, and a greater sense of agency to do something about it.”

Question Set 2, Interview 7: Saf

Has this experience changed or affected your definition of happiness? If so, how?

“I think it has, because I wasn’t aware of how attentive I am of group dynamics. And I wasn’t aware of how much group dynamics affected my mental security and that has a lot to do with whether or not I am happy. I found specifics that make me happy. I didn’t realize how much I liked wind. Before I didn’t like wind, but when I don’t have anything to do, I like that feeling. I feel the same way about water against my skin.”

Can you rate your current happiness level 1-10, 1 being the lowest, and 10 the highest, and explain why you feel this way?

“Probably a 6 or 7, while I am happy and content. I also want to go home and I have some impatience for that.”

How do you think we, as in society, can find a balance between sustainable behavior/ development and happiness?

“Learning to find happiness in being sustainable, to find pleasure in that. Which I realize is hard and work has to be done to increase the social value of being sustainable. When social value increase, the pleasure individuals find increases.”

Do you think your life and behavior will change after returning from this experiment? Why or why not?

“I think I’ll be much more aware of myself and much more aware of earth related issues and how that affects me. Before, I was aware of stuff relating to clean air and water, but not so much the worth of those things.”

Can you tell me anything else about this experience and how this experiment has affected your outlook on sustainable development and happiness?

“I suppose because I have the awareness of the value of being sustainable, its worth more to be, so participating in that increases the feel of pleasure I get from doing that which increases happiness.”

 

Question Set 2, Interview 8: Me

Has this experience changed or affected your definition of happiness? If so, how?

“Yes and no. Being here and going through this experience has allowed me to better understand how to make myself happy, but it has also strengthened the fact that family and friends are truly at the root of my happiness. I’ve missed my boyfriend, my family, and my friends. I missed 3 birthdays and events with people I love. While it’s been for a good reason and I wouldn’t trade this experience, I know that being with them makes me happy.”

Can you rate your current happiness level 1-10, 1 being the lowest, and 10 the highest, and explain why you feel this way?

“I would say a 6.5/7. I think again, it’s always hard for me to be completely happy when I miss the people I care about. However, I’m happy because I am grateful for this experience. It hasn’t been easy the whole time, but the beautiful moments have really outshined any negatives and I don’t know if I’ve ever gone through so much personal and mental growth is such a short amount of time as I have done here. Learning how to cook with healthier ingredients and feeling better because of it has also helped my happiness.”

How do you think we, as in society, can find a balance between sustainable behavior/ development and happiness?

“I believe learning to live humbly, with a grateful heart and without comparison is what will help this balance. Material goods and money make people happy because they are striving for this higher standard of living or an idea of what is trendy or cool. We have a consumer society and things aren’t always built to last. When someone sees what someone else has, they want it. The idea that bigger is better. Instead of living humbly, many people upsize. No one is perfect, I am certainly not by far when it comes to sustainable behavior. But I think if we can collectively try to be conscious about consumption, where things come from, at what price, and the resources that must be consumed to create it, we can find a healthier balance. It’s all education and people practicing thoughtfulness and empathy.”

Do you think your life and behavior will change after returning from this experiment? Why or why not?

“I definitely think so. I know that I will be eating better, being more conscious of my meat, dairy, gluten, and sugar intake as whole. I am going to be much more aware of how long my showers are and try to cut down on things that take a long time, like shaving, and do that separately from the shower so I don’t keep the water running. I will have to see what I can do with my new living conditions when I get home, but I am hoping to be able to creatively use graywater as well.”

Can you tell me anything else about this experience and how this experiment has affected your outlook on sustainable development and happiness?

“This project has shown me that yes, sustainable behavior and happiness is possible. I do believe your values have to be engaged though. It’s easy to turn a blind eye, not think about it when you use water, or hear about water scarcity problems and think “that doesn’t affect me”. Especially in the Southwest, US, I think more people are finding that water scarcity does actually affect them in huge ways. As some of the other women have mentioned, this project is a very extreme side of sustainability. There are ways to be conscious and sustainable without these restrictions. I do think it took removing myself from society and the mainstream way of living in order to really make these conclusions. People will continue to do what is comfortable to them, but I think reaching out and trying to provide education can help. I am hoping that is what I can offer leaving this experiment, along with more understanding for the millions that live like this every day, and a greater sense of agency to do something about it.”

Day 21 | You Seven Are My Desert Odd Kin

 

Question Set 2, Interview 5: Jack

Has this experience changed or affected your definition of happiness? If so, how?

“It hasn’t really. I think I defined happiness quite a while back. This fits in to my idea of happiness, but it hasn’t changed it.”

Can you rate your current happiness level 1-10, 1 being the lowest, and 10 the highest, and explain why you feel this way?

“I would say 9. I would say 9 because this is the first time since being in the southwest that I feel really connected to it, to the land, the sky. Just going for walks and spending time with the desert, pushing my body, exploring this place and getting to know each other better, those are some of my favorite things to do. Our backyard is the Mojave Desert! And there is so much life out there. The sun sets in brilliant colors. We sleep outside under stars. I feel like I’m living in it now.”

How do you think we, as in society, can find a balance between sustainable behavior/ development and happiness?

“The empathy revolution. I think its really about prioritizing caring about each other and caring not only for humans, but about all the things you’re connected to, the animals, plants, land, and other humans. I could be saying that because I take a lot of joy in those things.”

Do you think your life and behavior will change after returning from this experiment? Why or why not?

“When I first moved from the city to an off-grid cabin in the Yukon, a lot of things about my behavior and awareness about the resources I used and their connection to the land changed up there. But here on this trip and this living scenario, it has been more about understanding water as a resource in a desert and understanding the things that my body needs in a, where I can’t catch rainwater or wheel my water jugs down to the creek to fill them up. But I will drink more water. It’s been really good to be conscious about my intake and hopefully that awareness will serve me.”

Can you tell me anything else about this experience and how this experiment has affected your outlook on sustainable development and happiness?

“I mean for me this project very early on became less about navigating the water usage and more about fast tracking community building. Community building and really caring for the people I am living with even though we don’t know each other well and may never be in each other’s lives after this. I’ve been reading this book since I’ve been here, it’s called “Sticking with the Trouble: Making Kin in the Cthulucene” By Donna Haraway. The book is really about ways to think in and with and about the world so we can live and die well together. She talks about the importance of making odd kin, those you are response-able for, human or otherwise. Reading her work in the context of this experiment has formed the way I think about sustainability, maybe more than Ostrom’s principles. If I care about you, I would share that last bit of food or water and that also makes decisions that I make about a limited resource individualistic and more about the people I am responsible for. You seven are my desert odd kin. And those ravens up on the water tower too. Let’s figure out how to live well together.”

Question Set 2, Interview 6: BCC:

Has this experience changed or affected your definition of happiness? If so, how?

“Yes. It has expanded my definition of happiness. I suppose I got here and instantly fell in love with the place was super excited and very happy to be here, but in being here I realized it was less about the place and more about my presence as a being in and with the environment and that allows the happiness I’ve found here to transfer to anywhere in the whole world. And that’s a beautiful notion. I am as excited to leave as I was to get here. And it’s all happy and with good juju.”

Can you rate your current happiness level 1-10, 1 being the lowest, and 10 the highest, and explain why you feel this way?

“11. Because I feel fully embraced by the universe.”

How do you think we, as in society, can find a balance between sustainable behavior/ development and happiness?

“I think that takes life practice of living directly with the earth. Being here I think the major component to being able to be present has a lot to do with the fact that the desert is bound to no constraints of man. Your watch isn’t going to tell you anymore than what the sun has got beaming over your head. How the plants get their water, how you get your water, how we cycle. People have to get out of their homes and sleep under the stars to understand to integrate that into their lives on a day to day basis.”

Do you think your life and behavior will change after returning from this experiment? Why or why not?

“Definitely. It already has. I think the way it will change my behavior or life has everything to do with the fact that I came here looking for a change, a solution, with an open mind. I don’t know where everyone is at, but to be open to change is the first part of anything being possible. I definitely realize how little I need to consume on a regular basis and what healthy things I can implement into my diet with very little time. Water conscious, healthy things. But just being a part of living I feel like my eternal energy has been revitalized and I plan to carry that with me as long as possible. And when it runs out I’ll come back.”

Can you tell me anything else about this experience and how this experiment has affected your outlook on sustainable development and happiness?

“I think it’s further proved to me that sustainable practices, not just about building materials or individual choices, but it’s about how we treat our neighbors and how we care for our planet and what kind of relationship we build with the world.”

 

Day 19 | Living With the Heat

 

We have finally hit the time of year where the days are hot and they show no signs of cooling back down. Out here, our days hover around 110 degrees and there is little relief. Most of us have started sleeping outdoors since it is cooler at night outside than in our rooms. We are more aware now of the dangers of the heat and the importance of finding cooled spaces and staying hydrated. During the highest heat of the day, we are all very relaxed and almost immobile. We read, sleep, or work, but we stay away from the sun and are mostly indoors. I would predict that our water usage will continue to increase as we drink more and rinse ourselves to cool down. I will be looking after everyone here more closely now with the increased dangers of the heat. It will be interesting to see how the heat affects the happiness and overall comfort of the women here this next week. I hope we are able to find refuge and the heat does not affect our community dynamic.

Question Set 2, Interview 3: Moso

Has this experience changed or affected your definition of happiness? If so, how?

“No. I’m pretty confident on my views of happiness.”

Can you rate your current happiness level 1-10, 1 being the lowest, and 10 the highest, and explain why you feel this way?

“I would say a 7. It’s hard to feel happy when I’m so miserably hot, but my general outlook on life is still a happyish one.”

How do you think we, as in society, can find a balance between sustainable behavior/ development and happiness?

“I think we really have to shift our priorities from ourselves to also include others, to be more community minded. Like speaking of the US specifically, we just care about ourselves, not everyone is this way, but our culture in general, wants a lot of stuff and money. And that’s what makes them happy, but that’s not the only way to find happiness. People are just so caught up in this self-centered focus, to make any advancements we really need to look outside of ourselves and be aware.”

Do you think your life and behavior will change after returning from this experiment? Why or why not?

“Yeah. I think that it’s taught me to slow down, which I’ve really enjoyed. It’s also shown me that I can live on minimal amounts of water. There are certain things that I probably won’t keep doing like using graywater to flush the toilet, but I’ll probably still collect gray water and water things outside with it. I actually kind of like how we have this water method where it is easy to control the flow of water. Like, when I turned on a faucet at the store, there was just so much water, coming out so fast! Also, I will continue this diet, but modified. I will probably keep eating meat, but not as often as I was eating meat.”

Can you tell me anything else about this experience and how this experiment has affected your outlook on sustainable behavior and happiness?

“I think it’s shown me it’s simultaneously hard and easy to live this way. There are aspects that come naturally to me, like conserving the water, using less, reusing things, and being resourceful. But then this sort of other aspect of this experience like community living has really been a challenge for me. You know you don’t have to live in a trailer with 7 other people in order to be sustainable, but it’s an interesting discovery, especially now that I’m older to really recognize where I function the best and what kind of space I need and what space I need to give other people. How involved you are, how involved you aren’t. Like we talked about, there is definitely a balance of stepping up and stepping back.”

Question Set 2, Interview 4: Skip

Has this experience changed or affected your definition of happiness? If so, how?

“I don’t really know. I think what it has done is show me to slow down and find the simpler things. I feel like it’s always been the simpler things, but what’s smaller than that. Stepping away from communicating with people every day, wanting to go to events and wanting to be on social media.”

Can you rate your current happiness level 1-10, 1 being the lowest, and 10 the highest, and explain why you feel this way?

“I would stay I’m at a 6.5. A little higher than content, but the heat has taken a big toll on me and adjusting to it. And not feeling productive or as clear minded.”

How do you think we, as in society, can find a balance between sustainable behavior/ development and happiness?

“Want less. I think as society and even corporations, the demand for new products is huge. And it goes with how things are made. They are made to be broken and only last a few months. Slowing down demand and production. Also coming together with your community and neighborhood. Finding that community that is yours and sharing. That’s one thing we did here. It took us a while to find our flow and get comfortable in it, but I think that really helped here.”

Do you think your life and behavior will change after returning from this experiment? Why or why not?

“Yeah, definitely. Looking at just the water usage. Being able to live off under 4 gallons of water a day is insane and awesome. I know I have a super busy schedule, so that’s going to change. I’m more conscious about my water and collecting gray water to reuse it. Also thinking about the diet. I feel really good, the food is really good. Learning how to cook such large meals will help with not eating fast and processed food. Also making meals that I can freeze will cut down on waste. Also just being more conscious about what on labels. Not just on food and drinks but also clothing.”

Can you tell me anything else about this experience and how this experiment has affected your outlook on sustainable behavior and happiness?

“I don’t think my outlook has changed, but I think it has strengthened that sustainability and happiness can coexist. This is an extreme case and by no means do I think society should live this way and I question how sustainable this experiment is in the long run. The food and water part is, but more or less thinking about the shelter. I think it taught me how to be sustainable with a collective.”

Day 16 | “It’s Too Late to be a Pessimist”

 

Question Set 2, Interview 1: Na.Ru

Has this experience changed or affected your definition of happiness? If so, how?

“I still don’t know what my definition of happiness is. However, it has clarified it a little more. I find my time enjoyable when I can find common ground with the people I am living with.”

Can you rate your current happiness level 1-10, 1 being the lowest, and 10 the highest, and explain why you feel this way?

“I would say 7 or 8. These past few days have been super rough emotionally, but I’m getting some insight and talking about it. I was looking at the art when we went to town and it was making me happy. I started to feel more excited about life and more at peace.”

How do you think we, as in society, can find a balance between sustainable behavior/ development and happiness?

“I think Ostrom’s is a good start. Really communicating with your community.”

Do you think your life and behavior will change after returning from this experiment? Why or why not?

“Yes. It’s a lot easier than I thought to change. It’s even kind of exciting. There are lots and lots of people living this way who are also excited about change.”

Can you tell me anything else about this experience and how this experiment has affected your outlook on sustainable development and happiness?

“So, when I think about sustainability, I mostly think about the possibility of happiness while being sustainable. I think in order to give up the lifestyles we’ve had and practice sustainability, we have to practice gratitude and living within our means, which is manageable and we can cultivate our own happiness. Just basically that there is so much work to do in the world to fight climate change and everything else that intersects with climate change. By having sustainable behavior, I’m able to realize that I am doing my part, and that makes me happy too. Or at least not as depressed.”

 

Question Set 2, Interview 2: Nayara

Has this experience changed or affected your definition of happiness? If so, how?

“I guess in a way. I was really upset when there was no internet. I didn’t know there wouldn’t be. I thought we would be able to get it someway on site. I also thought I’d get service somewhere. When I realized there wasn’t, I was really anxious and afraid and I thought that would make me unhappy. I was worried about that, but I found that being without it, after the withdrawals, but now I’m reading more than I usually do. I’m able to focus better because I don’t have that distraction of the internet. I was afraid to go to bed at night because I usually go on my phone before bed. At first it was weird to be without it, I thought I was going to miss it. It has been a detox and reduced my codependency with the internet and my phone. I was afraid of being alone, but no so much anymore.”

Can you rate your current happiness level 1-10, 1 being the lowest, and 10 the highest, and explain why you feel this way?

“I’d probably say like an 8. I’m really content here. I like the people and the food we are eating and what we have set up here. I miss my partner and the heat is very hard to deal with. Those are the only things that are affecting my happiness.”

How do you think we, as in society, can find a balance between sustainable behavior/ development and happiness?

“I think that in order for us to move forward, we have to admit where we are at. And I don’t think Americans are there right now. As Biggie said “mo’ money, mo’ problems”. We’re not happier with our “supposedly” higher standards of living. We are taught that we are the richest country in the world and that’s supposed to make us the best, but we have the highest rate of depression. We have to admit that we aren’t happy. Once we’ve come to that acknowledgement, we can look at what does make us happy. Right now I feel happy about the situation I’m in, because we’ve created a supportive community. Humans are social creatures. Our current society puts us in isolation. Building walkable and higher density communities, where you know your neighbors because you walk or bike with them to work is one example of how this balance can be achieved. Creating more communal space at the cost of having smaller houses and less urban sprawl can build both happy and sustainable communities.”

Do you think your life and behavior will change after returning from this experiment? Why or why not?

“Yeah. Definitely the “mellow yellow” thing. I did it before, but it started to stink and I gave up. But I’m more interested in how I could save the gray water and maybe take water from my sprinkler in the apartment complex I live in that sprays on the cement. I think my diet is going to change. I never thought I could be a vegan, but I am highly considering it. I think I might start with only eating dairy and cheese on the weekends because I am already a vegetarian, so it wouldn’t be too much of a change. I’ll also probably focus on buying in season and local foods.”

Can you tell me anything else about this experience and how this experiment has affected your outlook on sustainable development and happiness?

“This experiment solidified my hypothesis that individualism is at the root of environmental problems. More important that the water scarcity, was creating a community that we could trust and would support each other. You can’t address an environmental crisis on your own. It’s going to require us to work together.”

Day 13 | Reflection

 

Today is day thirteen. I have been here for almost two weeks with these other women. Today I am continuing my reflection on this experience thus far and the challenges that come with living off of four gallons of water a day.

When I first came to this place, I was nervous and scared. I knew that this process would take physical and mental strength and endurance. Now thirteen days in, I have found peace and a rhythm. I still miss home and those I care about, but I have a comfortable routine here and with the other women. We have developed a stronger sense of comraderie being here for a couple weeks now. My days have stopped moving in slow motion. Before I know it, the sun is setting over the mountains and we are all sitting outside eating dinner. I have found a purpose for my days. At first, I had anxiety and I felt restless. I was so used to being busy and if I was bored, I would make myself busy or numb the empty with technology, social media, etc. I can’t do that here. I can’t run from time or my thoughts. I just have to exist in this space.

Living off of four gallons of water a day has its challenges, but I also realize how conscious it has made me about my water usage. I used to believe behaviors that require a lot of water at home, also a dry desert, were necessary. That they were survival. However, after being here for only two weeks and experiencing water scarcity first hand, I realize that so many of those behaviors are not dire. They are societally constructed. Humans can conserve and living off of less doesn’t have to degrade your standard of living. There is also something exciting about knowing that it is possible. I can live off of four gallons of water a day or less. It has sparked a lot of truly interesting conversations here and creativity. It might not always be comfortable because I am accustomed to running water at the turn of a handle, but I can do it and that is a comforting thought.

The vegan/ water conscious diet was also a hurdle I had to learn to overcome. My body was detoxing and I had horrible cravings. Now, even though my body is still detoxing, I no longer have these feelings. My skin feels/looks better and I am less bloated. I have lost almost eight pounds, but I feel so much lighter beyond the number. I fall right to sleep at night and I toss and turn less than I did at home. My body is definitely happy here, despite the increasing heat.

Although I was nervous, I really needed this time in the desert. Here I can decompress. I needed to be able to center and remove myself from the “go, go, go”. It is so different to study something and then put your body on the line to research it more. It has already been a very tough, emotional, and educational experience. I am ready for the next two weeks as I follow up with each of the women here and ask them about their conclusions about sustainable development/ behavior and happiness.

Day 12 | People and Moments

 

Interview 8: Me

“While I think it’s important to know how to make yourself happy, my most happy moments live in the people I love and the important moments in my life.”

-What is your definition of happiness?

“Happiness to me means being secure and safe. When I think of being happy, I picture doing things I enjoy with people I care about and knowing that everyone is okay. While I think it’s important to know how to make yourself happy, my most happy moments live in the people I love and the important moments in my life.”

-What makes you happy?

“My family, particularly my niece and nephew, my friends, my boyfriend. Accomplishing something. Creating something. Doing something that matters. Traveling. The beach. Rollercoasters and street tacos.”

-What physical objects or technologies affect your happiness and why?

“My phone and social media is a big one. It can make my happiness go up or down depending on what I see. Most the time my happiness goes up because I can stay updated with important moments in my family and friends lives that I may not get to see often. My computer or TV. I enjoy staying up to date on shows that I like to watch.”

-Has limited access to water affected your overall state of happiness and if so, how?

“Water hasn’t seemed to be a big issue actually. I use about two gallons a day for drinking, washing my face, and brushing my teeth. I have a solid amount of water saved up for when I need to take showers, which also requires about two gallons each for me, or when I need to wash my clothes. Not having running water does make activities more challenging, but it hasn’t really affected my happiness.”

-What is one thing you wish you could do right now that you feel would bring you happiness, but you are currently unable to do it because of your environment or access to water?

“See all my people or check social media. Download another book to read because I have gone through the ones I brought with me.”

-How has your happiness changed since you have been here?

“I really struggled at the beginning. I was nervous to come in the first place, but I knew I would learn a lot and never regret the experience. Once I got here, there was a lot that I had to get acclimated to very quickly beyond the water restrictions. I had to learn 7 new personalities and how to navigate them. I am someone that enjoys down time and I had to learn to really remove myself if I needed to recharge. Now that I am halfway through this experiment, I am trying to soak up everything I can and just really be grateful for this opportunity.”

-As of 2023, the extreme water regulations are newer to the United States population, yet in other cultures and communities around the world, the energy required for securing and maintaining water is consistently this difficult, if not more. How has this experience allowed you to empathize and think about other areas and cultures of people that have such limited access to water or has it?

“I would have to echo some of the other participants here and say that it hasn’t completely allowed me to empathize, but it has allowed me to maybe understand some pieces of it. I am not nearly in the same type of environment here that many other people around the world are in when it comes to water scarcity. I have an abundance of water I can use if I need it. It is not strenuous to retrieve my water either, but I do see how thinking and priorities must change when you are put in this type of environment.”

-What or who has provided you comfort and happiness while being here?

“I knew Na.Ru before coming into this experiment and she has been someone I felt like I could talk to. Nayara, Jack, and BCC are all people I feel have really helped my happiness level at one point or another in this environment. I also have enjoyed reading and getting to enjoy the sunsets and night skies without the light pollution of the city.”

-Can you tell me anything else about your current state of happiness?

“There are bound to be aspects of a new environment that one isn’t use to that will affect his/her happiness. However, I feel like I have done well here despite a bumpy start and I am going to work really hard to enjoy the time I have left.”

 

Day 11 | Climbing

 

Bugs. In the city, I would swat them away, freak out if I thought they were harmful and came close. Here, they are a part of everything and they are everywhere. It is really fascinating the difference and abundance in the types of bugs here in contrast to home. Consideration for insects and bugs should be thought about regardless of location, but I feel different towards them here as if I am the intruder into their home, not the other way around. Although, that doesn’t make them less annoying. I also have a mouse who comes into my room at night. He is big and brown and I’ll admit, he has big cute ears. When I first saw him, I screamed, which startled him and he ran to hide. He has continued to come in again the last couple nights, marking three total encounters I’ve had thus far with him. However, I’m sure he comes in every night when it is dark and I am sleeping. I am starting to again realize that he was there first, even though I don’t really want to cohabitate or play this game he’s created for us. Learning to coexist with these different species so closely and becoming more comfortable with them will continue to be one of my challenges while I am here in this desert. Their home, not mine.   

Interview 7: Saf

“Things are settling down. I’m starting to figure out my relationship with people. Knowing where I fit, even if that’s just knowing that I don’t fit. Being able to orient myself with other people and in a group, I can choose what to be happy with based off that. Once I know people in the group well enough, I can determine how much of my happiness I choose to be based off of what they are doing.”

-What is your definition of happiness?

“The basic level would be being in a space and being comfortable with the people, and then within that would be being able to do what I enjoy and what makes me happy. Usually some form of geeking out over something I like and having the time and concentration. It sounds self-absorbed, but being able to focus on me and the stuff that I like.”

-What makes you happy?

“It sounds kind of odd, but geeking out. Being really absorbed in some sort of fictional narrative. Just getting really into that.”

-What physical objects or technologies affect your happiness and why?

“Computers, definitely. Because it’s through computers that I tend to access most of the material that I watch, like television shows. Also news, which I get through the computer, my happiness can drop because of the news. Things that remind me of home. Like I brought a blanket that I’ve had since I was a baby. I’m also very sentimental, so bits of jewelry. Even my pillow case actually and the feelings of safety that come from those objects and the people that gave them to me or what it reminds me of.”

-Has limited access to water affected your overall state of happiness and if so, how?

“Not really. Not nearly as much as I thought it would. Also because I tend to enjoy long showers and baths which are water intensive. I thought I would mind being dirty and sweaty more than I do. I also sleep on a towel to protect my blanket because that’s important to me. I think it’s because everyone else here is dirty and sweaty like me, but just on its own, no.”

-What is one thing you wish you could do right now that you feel would bring you happiness, but you are currently unable to do it because of your environment or access to water?

“Because this is a desert, there isn’t that much stuff to climb and I really like to climb. Something about being in the air with the wind, it blows all the thoughts out my head and I really like being up that high. And I’ve been doing it since I was a kid, so I feel very secure in doing it and I enjoy it. The biggest trouble with living in the desert is there aren’t any hills. Not real hills. There aren’t any trees that you can climb.”

-How has your happiness changed since you have been here?

“I was quite nervous actually, because I knew it was going to be a strange situation with people I wouldn’t know if I would get along with. It’s up and down with the group dynamics. Things are settling down. I’m starting to figure out my relationship with people. Knowing where I fit, even if that’s just knowing that I don’t fit. Being able to orient myself with other people and in a group, I can choose what to be happy with based off that. Once I know people in the group well enough, I can determine how much of my happiness I choose to be based off of what they are doing.”

-As of 2023, the extreme water regulations are newer to the United States population, yet in other cultures and communities around the world, the energy required for securing and maintaining water is consistently this difficult, if not more. How has this experience allowed you to empathize and think about other areas and cultures of people that have such limited access to water or has it?

“I tend to learn through experience, when I read about something, it doesn’t tend to affect me as much as it should because I’m just reading about it. It takes experience for me to empathize. Although I’m aware this isn’t nearly as bad as what other people experience, our water is local and we don’t have to travel to only get the amount of water that they can carry. I’m definitely much more aware of the difficulties, despite the things that we have better here.”

-What or who has provided you comfort and happiness while being here?

“Finding something to climb. It’s cool that it’s in an area that’s communal and in a communal space. It’s something that no one else has shown interest in so it’s something that has become mine. Just the people. No one specifically, but the check-ins or the small private moments where you find similarities or things you share with other people. The closeness, but also the ability to go away from each other. As a group, the dynamics.”

-Can you tell me anything else about your current state of happiness?

“I think I evened out. It’s not quite as up and down as it was in the beginning. I’m pretty happy that we are only half way done. I think I have more of an idea where I am and I can regulate the bumps better.”

Day 10 | Guests

 

A few nights ago we had three guests come to drylab. They were members of the Feral Exchange Network. A group of rebel travellers who fly under the radar of governments, allotting a space in their suitcase for goods that will be given or traded along their route. The rules of the Feral Exchange are that the goods must be carried with them and given in-person They offered us treats for gifts or for barter such as dark chocolate, apples, coffee, smoked salmon, and cheese. These luxury items that we no longer have access to under our water restrictions. In exchange, I gave each of the guests a bracelet I made from hemp rope and plastic beads that I created from water bottle waste in the desert. Two of the other women offered a sketch and print they had created. After dinner, we had a cheese plate for everyone to share and we talked about their work and our time here. It was so nice to have guests, to talk, laugh, and to indulge in some foods and drinks that are usually restricted. Before drylab, these foods and drinks were always available to me. Whenever I wanted them, I could go to the store and pick them up. Having them the other night, after a week of not having access, it made the food and occasion more special. Our guests’ visit will continue to be a happy highlight from our time here in the desert.

Day 9 | Beautiful Signs from the Universe

 

Day 9 | Beautiful Signs from the Universe

I am growing happier here. There was the originally shock. It’d describe my initial acclimation as a trip, hit, fall, and scrape into this space. Now I have settled in, I found routine and a process for my days. I cook, read, work, write, explore, and spend a lot of time just sitting in the space. Sometimes my anxiety puts a pit in my stomach and I feel claustrophobic. Then I breathe and look around. I grew up in the desert and I think that made me feel like only forests and places with abundance of water and green plants were beautiful. Always wanting what you don’t have. The heat of the southwest pushing me away throughout my life. I recall being as young as twelve years old and thinking “I’m getting out of here.” But as I sit in this desert, I’m reminded that it is beautiful too. Stunningly beautiful. There is culture here. I am humbled and also upset at myself for having been ungrateful for my home and the beauty it offers, despite the faults I usually linger on. Even though this is not my home, the desert feels like home in so many ways and I proud to be cut from its cloth.

Interview 6: BCC:

“I think my happiness has increased being here because my day to day is not about getting to appointments or dealing with deadlines or sitting in traffic or dealing with bullshit. It is about surviving… There are things I want to work on as a person in myself and I can do that here without the structure of society.”

-What is your definition of happiness?

“I have been thinking about that. Spacious accommodating presence. When there is no room for doubt.”

-What makes you happy?

“Oh man. I didn’t think about that part of the question. Sitting on the stoop.”

-What physical objects or technologies affect your happiness and why?

“My truck. It’s my implement for autonomy.”

-Has limited access to water affected your overall state of happiness and if so, how?

“I wouldn’t say the water so much. I think I’m the happiest here than I have been anywhere. Minus all the crap, this is the best place I’ve been so far.”

-What is one thing you wish you could do right now that you feel would bring you happiness, but you are currently unable to do it because of your environment or access to water?

“I want to go swimming so bad. I’d like to jump in a river, or lake, or the ocean, or really anything. A good sized puddle.”

-How has your happiness changed since you have been here?

“I think my happiness has increased being here because my day to day is not about getting to appointments or dealing with deadlines or sitting in traffic or dealing with bullshit. It is about surviving and these are things that I’d like to develop as a person and character. There are things I want to work on as a person in myself and I can do that here without the structure of society.”

-As of 2023, the extreme water regulations are newer to the United States population, yet in other cultures and communities around the world, the energy required for securing and maintaining water is consistently this difficult, if not more. How has this experience allowed you to empathize and think about other areas and cultures of people that have such limited access to water or has it?

“I don’t know if it’s necessarily empathizing because who am I to know? But the comprehension makes me better understand how the day gets consumed. How you’re working to eat and drink from the time you get up till the time you go to bed. There isn’t a lot of additional time to make other improvements if yours in a structure that doesn’t support it.”

-What or who has provided you comfort and happiness while being here?

“Laughter. And beautiful signs from the universe.”

-Can you tell me anything else about your current state of happiness?

“I don’t know. It’s clear.”

Day 8 | Free

 

The heat. Water. Sweat. Food. Sleep. The heat. My mind continuously falling into more basic needs and feelings. Rotating through immediate discomforts and thoughts. I notice my body more here. I have the time now to acknowledge the way that if feels and all of these feelings are more vivid than before. I surprisingly don’t smell, not as bad as I originally thought I would. It could be that we are eating clean and healthy, or it could be that I just don’t notice anymore. I have lost 6 pounds in the week that I have been here. The heat is picking up and it’s not likely to quit as we move deeper into the summer. Our days will be mellow while our nights and early mornings become busy working hours. I assume I will be using more water and rinsing off more, forcing me to be even more conscious about my consumption and what water I have left over. Although I grew up in a desert, being here reminds me how beautiful the desert can be, despite my immediate discomforts from the heat.

Interview 5: Jack

“The things that feel really important in the city, the things that cause you to say “I haven’t done enough” for me they start to fall away when I am in spaces like this.”

-What is your definition of happiness?

“Oh my god, can we come back to this one at the end…? Feeling good about who I am, what I’m doing. The people in my life. The things I can share and the things I can learn from. Feeling good about that stuff.”

-What makes you happy?

“Projects and having something to work on. Close friends. Weirdos. Living in the woods. Digging in the dirt. My cabin. Instagram likes. Getting an idea in my head and making it happen. Good conversation. Coffee. In particular coffee with a friend, but coffee in general.”

-What physical objects or technologies affect your happiness and why?

“I have a few objects that I bring with me whenever I go somewhere for a chunk of time… I’m pretty spread out: between the east coast of Canada, the far north of Canada and the desert southwest, so there are certain objects that makes me feel like this space is mine. And not all of the items have to have a memory attached. It can be aesthetic. Since I decided to leave my home for good, I’ve done this non-committal nesting thing where I’ll bring certain things and also buy things are thrift store, build some shelves and set up my space. Shelves make me happy. Living out of a suitcase does not make me happy.”

-Has limited access to water affected your overall state of happiness and if so, how?

“No. When I am living up north, I live off the grid, so I’m always paying attention to the water I use and the systems of water I use. And this situation is a privileged situation, so no it hasn’t affected my happiness. Because if shit hit the fan, I know I could go back to the city to get water, I know it is a privileged position to be in. Also, I’m drinking way more water now. I’m more conscious of how much I’m hydrating.”

-What is one thing you wish you could do right now that you feel would bring you happiness, but you are currently unable to do it because of your environment or access to water?

“I wish we all could have a glass of wine together at night. There is just something about sharing a glass of wine that connects us, ya know? It brings us into commune.”

-How has your happiness changed since you have been here?

“I feel really good here. It’s glorious. I was so busy. The busy/ness of the city, I enjoy, but being in that go go, go mode and then coming here and having your days in this space and getting to know the land and what grows here, it just feels really good. The things that feel really important in the city, the things that cause you to say “I haven’t done enough” for me they start to fall away when I am in spaces like this, and it’s about, when can I go out for a walk, what am I seeing, did I drink enough water, what can we do to the property to make this a better space to live in. And then those things become really important. And that feels really good.”

-As of 2023, the extreme water regulations are newer to the United States population, yet in other cultures and communities around the world, the energy required for securing and maintaining water is consistently this difficult, if not more. How has this experience allowed you to empathize and think about other areas and cultures of people that have such limited access to water or has it?

“I mean, I’ve been thinking about that as we go, although there is this divide in that this is a project that we have chosen to do to be aware of our own consumption. It’s hard to connect them for me.”

-What or who has provided you comfort and happiness while being here?

“I go for at least 2 hour walks a day. I decided while on the walks, while I was here I was going to learn to sing better. I walk out in the desert far enough where I think no one can hear me, it’s a freedom from thinking that I’m not good enough at singing, no one can hear me, it’s really freeing to sing. Singing feels good, and it feels good to not worry about it. Collecting things, going exploring and seeing what was left there and seeing that I may be able to see it in a differing way. When you walk out, and you’re by yourself, and noises are louder. All of the animals are camouflaged into the desert rocks, but you can start seeing them. It makes me feel closer to the place I’m in.”

-Can you tell me anything else about your current state of happiness?

“I don’t know, I just feel good here. I find this place wild and it’s exciting to be able to understand myself in it and learn from it, so that makes me happy. I’m also sleeping more than I usually do.”